your favorite absurd football stories
Posted: Mon Oct 27, 2014 11:03 am
NOTE: For those who save Biographies, there are some classic quotes within this Thread.
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your favorite absurd football stories
Started by JWL, Oct 11 2013 12:23 AM
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56 replies to this topic
#1 JWL
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 12:23 AM
I loved the "Hall of Shame" books of the late 1980s and 1990s. My favorite stories were the ones about Fats Fothergill biting an ump and some outfielder on the Blue Jays who made it his goal to urinate in every American League outfield. Those were baseball stories.
What about crazy NFL stories like that? I will think about it. While I am doing that, you can write about your favorite crazy NFL happenings.
#2 Reaser
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 01:49 AM
Any story Art Donovan told, those are favorites, the stories themselves and how he told them.
Otherwise, most of the stuff would come from reading about the 20's; refs marking off ridiculously long penalties just because they could, a player dropkicking a ref, having to chase down fan to get back the ONE football they had so they could play the game, adventures of some of the colorful characters (i.e. Johnny Blood), how the league functioned, signing players, etc ...
Can throw in AFL/NFL "war" stories also.
#3 Nwebster
Forum Visitors
Posted 11 October 2013 - 07:43 AM
Agree on Donovan, its really certain characters about whom the best stories seem to be.
any story involving Doug Atkins could make the list too. My personal favorite is his shooting a gun down the hallway of at training camp because he objected to the music being played by teammates. Pretty much anything about his drinking exploits is good too.
Big Daddy Lipscomb had some goodies as well, having a teammate jump on his shoulders to try to block a kick and, again, pretty much. Any of the drinking /womanizing stories were good.
when you hear these stories from the 50's you thank God Roger Goodell wasn't commissioner back then, these guys would've been suspended for weeks and weeks.
#4 Ken Crippen
Administrator
Posted 11 October 2013 - 09:06 AM
Reaser, on 11 Oct 2013 - 01:49 AM, said:
Any story Art Donovan told, those are favorites, the stories themselves and how he told them.
Donovan was always great with his stories.
#5 rhickok1109
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 01:39 PM
I heard this story twice when I was young, first from Buckets Goldenberg himself and then from Don Hutson as a corroborating witness.
When I was about 10 years old, I went with my father and Tom White, the Packer public address announcer, to a Packer game in Milwaukee. After the game, we went to Buckets Goldenberg's restaurant and Goldenberg, who knew both Dad and Tom White, sat down to talk with us.
Goldenberg had begun his career with the Packers as a back, playing either quarterback (blocking back) or fullback. But in 1938 Lambeau moved him to guard, where he spent the last eight years of his long career.
Since Hutson always drew a lot of defenders, Lambeau put in a hook-and-lateral play for a 1938 game. Hutson was to catch a buttonhook pass over the middle and then lateral it quickly to a streaking Bob Monnett, who would then run the rest of the way for a TD. At least, that's how it was drawn up.
But it didn't go the way it was drawn up when the play was called. Goldenberg, who missed his days as a ballcarrier, went rushing down the field and tried to "intercept" the lateral from Hutson to Monnett. However, he couldn't latch on to the ball and Monnett had to fall on it to prevent a turnover.
Lambeau immediately sent in a substitute so he could chew Goldenberg out. "What the hell were you doing?" he demanded.
With a dreamy look in his eye, Goldenberg replied, "If I'da caught that ball, I'da been gone!"
Goldenberg was a notorious story-teller who sometimes stretched the truth a bit, so the following Saturday Dad and I went to Don Hutson's Packer Playdium, a bowling alley supper club that Hutson owned in downtown Green Bay. Hutson confirmed that the play had actually occurred, though he couldn't corroborate the dialogue on the sidelines.
#6 TouchdownTimmy
Forum
Posted 11 October 2013 - 03:14 PM
I always love reading the story of Kansas City Chiefs scout Lloyd Wells and how he almost lost wide receiver Otis Taylor to the NFL. Just reading everything that Wells had to go through to get Taylor out of that hotel room is classic stuff. I think that the best version of it can be found in the book "Winning it All: The Chiefs of the AFL" by Joe McGuff.
I met a couple a few years back who were Redskins season ticket holders and members of the team's band and chior back in the 1960's and 70's. They told me that when Sonny Jurgenson, Billy Kilmer and the crew were playing they had a house that they rented which was next door to them and that the players stayed there after partying the night before home games. The sons of this couples job was to go down on Sunday mornings and wake the players up so that they would get to RFK on time.
I ran into Jurgenson once and wanted to ask him if that story is true. Then I remembered what Sonny says about all of the stories told on him.
#7 Reaser
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 08:15 PM
from the recent Showtime piece on Lawrence Taylor, a lot of his stories and stories about him are "absurd" but him switching his sample with another players so he wouldn't fail the drug test, then failing anyways because the other players sample produced a failed test, that was something.
#8 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 11:04 PM
George Ratterman was Otto Graham's backup quarterback from 1952 through 1955 after which Graham retired. Ratterman had a reputation as a practical joker, and Cleveland coach and GM Paul Brown had a sample in 1949.
After winning the final AAFC championship in 1949, a game was arranged between the Browns and an All-Star team composed of players from other AAFC teams. On one of the days before the game, Ratternman called the Browns and said that their practice had been cancelled due to the rain. The guy who answered the phone started to tell the players, but assistant coach Blanton Collier happened to be nearby, and hearing about the cancellation, smelled a rat(terman). Collier called up Paul Brown and found out that it was a hoax.
Later at Cleveland, the Browns found out more of this. Ratterman once doctored scouting reports on an upcoming opponent with things like: "This man will fall down if tackled", and "This man (a defensive back) can be beaten on passing if he falls down and the receiver catches the ball."
Ratterman was always pulling pranks, but one time Brown got him back a little. In 1952, Otto Graham was having kind of an off year (for him), and in some of his more erratic moments, the crowd would chant, "We want Ratterman." Once when this happened, coach Brown called him over and said, "Your friends are calling for you." Ratterman thought, "Am I going into the game and run the offense?" Brown then said, "Why don't you go up into the stands and join them."
#9 Ken Crippen
Administrator
Posted 12 October 2013 - 07:36 AM
Jagade, on 11 Oct 2013 - 11:04 PM, said:
George Ratterman was Otto Graham's backup quarterback from 1952 through 1955 after which Graham retired. Ratterman had a reputation as a practical joker, and Cleveland coach and GM Paul Brown had a sample in 1949.
After winning the final AAFC championship in 1949, a game was arranged between the Browns and an All-Star team composed of players from other AAFC teams. On one of the days before the game, Ratternman called the Browns and said that their practice had been cancelled due to the rain. The guy who answered the phone started to tell the players, but assistant coach Blanton Collier happened to be nearby, and hearing about the cancellation, smelled a rat(terman). Collier called up Paul Brown and found out that it was a hoax.
Later at Cleveland, the Browns found out more of this. Ratterman once doctored scouting reports on an upcoming opponent with things like: "This man will fall down if tackled", and "This man (a defensive back) can be beaten on passing if he falls down and the receiver catches the ball."
Ratterman was always pulling pranks, but one time Brown got him back a little. In 1952, Otto Graham was having kind of an off year (for him), and in some of his more erratic moments, the crowd would chant, "We want Ratterman." Once when this happened, coach Brown called him over and said, "Your friends are calling for you." Ratterman thought, "Am I going into the game and run the offense?" Brown then said, "Why don't you go up into the stands and join them."
I highly recommend Ratterman's book "Confessions of a Gypsy Quarterback." Otto Graham wrote the introduction. One paragraph read, "The purpose of this foreward is to introduce you to a character named George Ratterman. George is a gentleman who sat on the bench my last four years and counted his money while I was risking life and limb. It only seems fitting that I should start off this book while George sits back and collects all of the royalties."
#10 Teo
PFRA Member
Posted 12 October 2013 - 10:59 AM
The stories about former Rams and Chargers coach Tommy Prothro are hilarious. One training camp with the Rams, Phrothro gathered the team and said to them: "Gentlemen, we have worked very hard this past weeks, so why we ho all put yo the beach". The players immediatily ran to their cars and Fred Dryer was knocked down and injured his thigh. Then, when he got to his car, the car wouldn't start and all the players had gone to the beach by then, and Dryer tried to fix it, then Phrothro came and said (very serious): "Dryah, you're missing the bettah part of the day".
#11 Todd Pence
Forum Visitors
Posted 12 October 2013 - 01:46 PM
Bob Gladieux being axed in the final cut by the 1970 Patriots. When he attended their opener against the Dolphins, he was summoned by PA to the locker room and told to suit up. He then proceeded to make the tackle on the opening kickoff.
#12 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 12 October 2013 - 10:53 PM
Ken Crippen, on 12 Oct 2013 - 07:36 AM, said:
I highly recommend Ratterman's book "Confessions of a Gypsy Quarterback." Otto Graham wrote the introduction. One paragraph read, "The purpose of this foreward is to introduce you to a character named George Ratterman. George is a gentleman who sat on the bench my last four years and counted his money while I was risking life and limb. It only seems fitting that I should start off this book while George sits back and collects all of the royalties."
Yes, that is a good one. Art Donovan and George Ratterman both played for the 1951 New York Yanks. The team didn't do very well, but they did have some fun playing various pranks on each other, but Donovan said about Ratterman that no one ever messed with him. He was too crazy.
#13 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 12 October 2013 - 10:58 PM
Teo, on 12 Oct 2013 - 10:59 AM, said:
The stories about former Rams and Chargers coach Tommy Prothro are hilarious. One training camp with the Rams, Phrothro gathered the team and said to them: "Gentlemen, we have worked very hard this past weeks, so why we ho all put yo the beach". The players immediatily ran to their cars and Fred Dryer was knocked down and injured his thigh. Then, when he got to his car, the car eouldn't start and all the players had gone to the beach by then, and Dryer tried to fix it, then Phrothro came and said (very serious): "Dryah, you're missing the bettah part if the day".
Here is one I heard about Prothro. Fred Dryer said that a kicker was practicing kicking field goals when Prothro rode out on the practice field in a golf cart. Prothro ran over a player's foot, causing a broken bone and the player was lost for the season.
#14 Gabe
Forum Visitors
Posted 13 October 2013 - 11:13 AM
Another George Ratterman story relates to the time he replied to one of Paul Brown's messenger guards during a game, "I don't like that play, tell Brown to send in another one." Supposedly the guard started to run back to the sidelines before Ratterman called him back to the huddle.
One of my favorite stories is the dialogue between Alex Karras and Joe Schmidt when Karras had an off-season ob as a door to door bible salesman one year, and showed up at Schmidt's house trying to sell him a bible stating that his had a different ending than all the others Schmidt had previously bought or read. It is in one of George Plimpton's books and is hilarious dialogue.
#15 Todd Pence
Forum Visitors
Posted 13 October 2013 - 12:17 PM
Arthur Cox, a Falcons tight end from the 1980's, had to have his knee surgery rescheduled. The doctor had instructed Cox not to eat anything after six P.M. on the night before his surgery the next morning. When Cox reported for surgery the next morning, the doctor asked him if he had eaten anything after six the previous night, "No," replied Cox, "But I had a big breakfast this morning."
#16 Jeffrey Miller
PFRA Member
Posted 13 October 2013 - 12:47 PM
Mike Mercer told me the story of Harvey Johnson's first team meeting after taking over as head coach of the Buffalo Bills in 1968. His rousing introductory speech went something like this: "I keep hearing all of this "if" shit ... we would have won "if" we had done this, we would have won "if" we had done that ... well, I'm sick of this "if" shit. Hell, if the Pilgrims had shot a cat instead of a turkey, we'd all be eating pussy for Thanksgiving ..."
#17 ronfitch
Forum Visitors
Posted 13 October 2013 - 10:20 PM
In Showtime's "Full Color Football," New York Titan Alex Kroll tells the story of the practice during the '62 season when the players realized that the coaches had disappeared - and quickly figured out that they (the coaches) had quietly snuck away to get a head start on the players to cash their paychecks, knowing that the team couldn't make payroll. Funny ... in retrospect.
#18 Nwebster
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Posted 14 October 2013 - 06:00 PM
ronfitch, on 13 Oct 2013 - 10:20 PM, said:
In Showtime's "Full Color Football," New York Titan Alex Kroll tells the story of the practice during the '62 season when the players realized that the coaches had disappeared - and quickly figured out that they (the coaches) had quietly snuck away to get a head start on the players to cash their paychecks, knowing that the team couldn't make payroll. Funny ... in retrospect.
Rick Neuheisel quoted something similar as happenings Ng with the San Antonio Gunslingers. Though I suppose that's probably not all that unusual in a "minor" league.
#19 Rupert Patrick
PFRA Member
Posted 14 October 2013 - 09:03 PM
Todd Pence, on 13 Oct 2013 - 12:17 PM, said:
Arthur Cox, a Falcons tight end from the 1980's, had to have his knee surgery rescheduled. The doctor had instructed Cox not to eat anything after six P.M. on the night before his surgery the next morning. When Cox reported for surgery the next morning, the doctor asked him if he had eaten anything after six the previous night, "No," replied Cox, "But I had a big breakfast this morning."
It reminded me of the Elvis Presley story about the time he had to go to the hospital first thing in the morning for a surgery, and the doctors told him he could not eat in the morning after he woke up, so in the middle of the night, he had one of his entourage wake him up and Elvis ate an entire cherry pie and went back to bed. No wonder he died at the age of 42.
#20 JuggernautJ
PFRA Member
Posted 14 October 2013 - 11:38 PM
This story regards one of the more famous blocks in NFL history.
The 73-0 drubbing that the Chicago Bears laid on the Washington Redskins in the 1940 Championship game began when (according to George Halas*)
"on the second play ... the ball went to fullback Bill Osmanski... (who) swung wide and ran 68 yards to a touchdown.
"I've seen plenty of hard blocks in my time but never one like the one which made this touchdown possible. George Wilson... threw it and it flattened both Ed Justice and Jimmy Johnson."
According to Howard Roberts**:
Halas later said "That was the greatest, most viscous block I ever saw." but
"Osmanksi shared a taxi with George and Mrs Wilson... after the game and in the course of the ride Mrs Wilson congratulated Bill on his amazing run." Adding "and that was quite a block... bye the way -- who threw it?
"George Wilson's reaction to that remark has never been recorded."
*The Forward Pass Revolution from The Saturday Evening Post of Dec 7, 1957 quoted in Allison Danzig's
Oh, How They Played The Game
**The Story of Pro Football by Howard Roberts p 28
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oldecapecod 11
your favorite absurd football stories
Started by JWL, Oct 11 2013 12:23 AM
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56 replies to this topic
#21 BD Sullivan
Forum Visitors
Posted 15 October 2013 - 12:39 AM
Ray Malavasi was being interviewed by a morning radio person--and fell asleep during the interview, complete with snoring.
Malavasi also had what might the most absurd comment in football history. After he found out his comments specifically ripping some Rams players were recorded, his response was "I don't care if it's on tape, I didn't say it."
#22 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 15 October 2013 - 12:56 AM
I am surprised that none of Joe Don Looney's exploits are not on this thread, yet.
Joe Don, a running back, was the first round draft choice of the New York Giants in 1964. He seemed to have everything. He was fast, built like a truck, and could play football. You might say that he had an attitude.
Looney, after some problems with the Giants' coaching staff, was traded to Baltimore, and after a short stay there, was traded to Detroit. I will focus on a couple of his milder incidents in Detroit.
He missed a practice with the Lions, so they sent in Joe Schmidt to have a talk with Joe Don in his dorm room. Schmidt told Looney that in all his years with Detroit, he never missed a practice. Joe Don replied, "Gee Joe, you need a day off."
In a game, coach Gilmer decided to send a play in and called Looney over. Harry Gilmer told Joe Don that he wanted him to take a play in to the quarterback. Looney replied, "If you want a messenger boy, call Western Union." I believe that Joe Don Looney was traded to Washington shortly after.
I guess that there are many other stories about Looney (I believe that there is a book), but those at Detroit were just a couple that I read about.
#23 John Grasso
Board of Directors
Posted 15 October 2013 - 08:30 AM
Here's a Joe Don Looney line from a 1969 Sports Illustrated article
"One night when he was 10 minutes late for bed check, he deemed the $50 fine unfair because he had gone to bed an hour early the night before. "They still owe me 50 minutes," he explained."
http://sportsillustr...ine/MAG1082669/
#24 TouchdownTimmy
Forum Visitors
Posted 15 October 2013 - 03:32 PM
Jagade, on 15 Oct 2013 - 12:56 AM, said:
I am surprised that non of Joe Don Looney's exploits are not on this thread, yet.
Joe Don, a running back, was the first round draft choice of the New York Giants in 1964. He seemed to have everything. He was fast, built like a truck, and could play football. You might say that he had an attitude.
Looney, after some problems with the Giants' coaching staff, was traded to Baltimore, and after a short stay there, was traded to Detroit. I will focus on a couple of his milder incidents in Detroit.
He missed a practice with the Lions, so they sent in Joe Schmidt to have a talk with Joe Don in his dorm room. Schmidt told Looney that in all his years with Detroit, he never missed a practice. Joe Don replied, "Gee Joe, you need a day off."
In a game, coach Gilmer decided to send a play in and called Looney over. Harry Gilmer told Joe Don that he wanted him to take a play in to the quarterback. Looney replied, "If you want a messenger boy, call Western Union." I believe that Joe Don Looney was traded to Washington shortly after.
I guess that there are many other stories about Looney (I believe that there is a book), but those at Detroit were just a couple that I read about.
Looney was a first round pick who supposedly had everything. Why is he never considered a bust?
#25 TouchdownTimmy
Forum Visitors
Posted 15 October 2013 - 03:38 PM
Charles Philyaw of the Oakland Raiders. In his book "They Call Me Assassin", Jack Tatum tells the story of how Philyaw wanted to know why he couldn't have his whole name on the back of his jersey. When it was explained to him that no one had their full name on their jersey, Philyaw said "Yes they do. See? VAN Eeghen."
#26 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 15 October 2013 - 08:38 PM
TouchdownTimmy, on 15 Oct 2013 - 3:32 PM, said:
Looney was a first round pick who supposedly had everything. Why is he never considered a bust?
I would guess that the Giants considered Looney to be a bust. I am sure that they wished that they had used their first round pick on someone else.
Of course, the Giants were one of the last teams to pick in the NFL draft that year, being that they played in the 1963 NFL championship game (the Giants picked 12th). Even worse would be to pick first or second and have the player not turn out very good. The Dallas Cowboys picked 4th that same year and picked a tackle named Scott Appleton in the first round. Appleton signed with the Houston Oilers instead of Dallas.
#27 rhickok1109
PFRA Member
Posted 16 October 2013 - 09:14 AM
Jagade, on 15 Oct 2013 - 8:38 PM, said:
I would guess that the Giants considered Looney to be a bust. I am sure that they wished that they had used their first round pick on someone else.
Of course, the Giants were one of the last teams to pick in the NFL draft that year, being that they played in the 1963 NFL championship game (the Giants picked 12th). Even worse would be to pick first or second and have the player not turn out very good. The Dallas Cowboys picked 4th that same year and picked a tackle named Scott Appleton in the first round. Appleton signed with the Houston Oilers instead of Dallas.
Appleton couldn't be called a bust, but he was a rather ordinary player.
#28 3243
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Posted 17 October 2013 - 03:55 AM
NWebster, on 11 Oct 2013 - 07:43 AM, said:
when you hear these stories from the 50's you thank God Roger Goodell wasn't commissioner back then, these guys would've been suspended for weeks and weeks.
And that's just for their off-field antics. For the way they played Goodell would have had each of the NFL's players transported to a CIA secret prison in some remote country.
#29 3243
Forum Visitors
Posted 17 October 2013 - 04:21 AM
There was Bill Peterson, who signed a "lifetime" contract in 1972 to coach the Houston Oilers, and was fired in mid-1973. (Hey, it was a LIFETIME deal! So what if he was 1-18? )
Apparently, Peterson also fought a losing battle with the English language as well, once telling his Oilers before a game to make sure they lined up correctly for the National Anthem--"with the sideline under your right arms and each of you standing on your helmets." Another time, he began a pre-game prayer with "Now I lay me down to sleep..."
When asked by a reporter about the players he had drafted in 1973 and how they would improve the team, Peterson did say kind words about "Matsooee, Amerson, and Blowchek," who were John Matuszak, George Amundson, and Joe Blahak, respectively. His propensity for getting names wrong also extended to veteran players like Elvin Bethea (whom he called Bethford), Mike Fanucci (Fasoochi), Ron Billingsley (Billingee), and Council Rudolph (Randolph Council).
Perhaps he would have had more success in the NFL (as he had as head coach at Florida State and Rice before taking the Oiler job) if he could only have taught his players at least this one thing: "You guys have to run more than full speed out there."
#30 rhickok1109
PFRA Member
Posted 17 October 2013 - 09:31 AM
3243, on 17 Oct 2013 - 04:21 AM, said:
There was Bill Peterson, who signed a "lifetime" contract in 1972 to coach the Houston Oilers, and was fired in mid-1973. (Hey, it was a LIFETIME deal! So what if he was 1-18? )
Apparently, Peterson also fought a losing battle with the English language as well, once telling his Oilers before a game to make sure they lined up correctly for the National Anthem--"with the sideline under your right arms and each of you standing on your helmets." Another time, he began a pre-game prayer with "Now I lay me down to sleep..."
When asked by a reporter about the players he had drafted in 1973 and how they would improve the team, Peterson did say kind words about "Matsooee, Amerson, and Blowchek," who were John Matuszak, George Amundson, and Joe Blahak, respectively. His propensity for getting names wrong also extended to veteran players like Elvin Bethea (whom he called Bethford), Mike Fanucci (Fasoochi), Ron Billingsley (Billingee), and Council Rudolph (Randolph Council).
Perhaps he would have had more success in the NFL (as he had as head coach at Florida State and Rice before taking the Oiler job) if he could only have taught his players at least this one thing: "You guys have to run more than full speed out there."
Peterson who once told his players to "line up alphabetically by height." He did come up with some gems
Page 2 of 3
to be CONTINUED
ARCHIVE
your favorite absurd football stories
Started by JWL, Oct 11 2013 12:23 AM
Page 1 of 3
56 replies to this topic
#1 JWL
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 12:23 AM
I loved the "Hall of Shame" books of the late 1980s and 1990s. My favorite stories were the ones about Fats Fothergill biting an ump and some outfielder on the Blue Jays who made it his goal to urinate in every American League outfield. Those were baseball stories.
What about crazy NFL stories like that? I will think about it. While I am doing that, you can write about your favorite crazy NFL happenings.
#2 Reaser
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 01:49 AM
Any story Art Donovan told, those are favorites, the stories themselves and how he told them.
Otherwise, most of the stuff would come from reading about the 20's; refs marking off ridiculously long penalties just because they could, a player dropkicking a ref, having to chase down fan to get back the ONE football they had so they could play the game, adventures of some of the colorful characters (i.e. Johnny Blood), how the league functioned, signing players, etc ...
Can throw in AFL/NFL "war" stories also.
#3 Nwebster
Forum Visitors
Posted 11 October 2013 - 07:43 AM
Agree on Donovan, its really certain characters about whom the best stories seem to be.
any story involving Doug Atkins could make the list too. My personal favorite is his shooting a gun down the hallway of at training camp because he objected to the music being played by teammates. Pretty much anything about his drinking exploits is good too.
Big Daddy Lipscomb had some goodies as well, having a teammate jump on his shoulders to try to block a kick and, again, pretty much. Any of the drinking /womanizing stories were good.
when you hear these stories from the 50's you thank God Roger Goodell wasn't commissioner back then, these guys would've been suspended for weeks and weeks.
#4 Ken Crippen
Administrator
Posted 11 October 2013 - 09:06 AM
Reaser, on 11 Oct 2013 - 01:49 AM, said:
Any story Art Donovan told, those are favorites, the stories themselves and how he told them.
Donovan was always great with his stories.
#5 rhickok1109
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 01:39 PM
I heard this story twice when I was young, first from Buckets Goldenberg himself and then from Don Hutson as a corroborating witness.
When I was about 10 years old, I went with my father and Tom White, the Packer public address announcer, to a Packer game in Milwaukee. After the game, we went to Buckets Goldenberg's restaurant and Goldenberg, who knew both Dad and Tom White, sat down to talk with us.
Goldenberg had begun his career with the Packers as a back, playing either quarterback (blocking back) or fullback. But in 1938 Lambeau moved him to guard, where he spent the last eight years of his long career.
Since Hutson always drew a lot of defenders, Lambeau put in a hook-and-lateral play for a 1938 game. Hutson was to catch a buttonhook pass over the middle and then lateral it quickly to a streaking Bob Monnett, who would then run the rest of the way for a TD. At least, that's how it was drawn up.
But it didn't go the way it was drawn up when the play was called. Goldenberg, who missed his days as a ballcarrier, went rushing down the field and tried to "intercept" the lateral from Hutson to Monnett. However, he couldn't latch on to the ball and Monnett had to fall on it to prevent a turnover.
Lambeau immediately sent in a substitute so he could chew Goldenberg out. "What the hell were you doing?" he demanded.
With a dreamy look in his eye, Goldenberg replied, "If I'da caught that ball, I'da been gone!"
Goldenberg was a notorious story-teller who sometimes stretched the truth a bit, so the following Saturday Dad and I went to Don Hutson's Packer Playdium, a bowling alley supper club that Hutson owned in downtown Green Bay. Hutson confirmed that the play had actually occurred, though he couldn't corroborate the dialogue on the sidelines.
#6 TouchdownTimmy
Forum
Posted 11 October 2013 - 03:14 PM
I always love reading the story of Kansas City Chiefs scout Lloyd Wells and how he almost lost wide receiver Otis Taylor to the NFL. Just reading everything that Wells had to go through to get Taylor out of that hotel room is classic stuff. I think that the best version of it can be found in the book "Winning it All: The Chiefs of the AFL" by Joe McGuff.
I met a couple a few years back who were Redskins season ticket holders and members of the team's band and chior back in the 1960's and 70's. They told me that when Sonny Jurgenson, Billy Kilmer and the crew were playing they had a house that they rented which was next door to them and that the players stayed there after partying the night before home games. The sons of this couples job was to go down on Sunday mornings and wake the players up so that they would get to RFK on time.
I ran into Jurgenson once and wanted to ask him if that story is true. Then I remembered what Sonny says about all of the stories told on him.
#7 Reaser
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 08:15 PM
from the recent Showtime piece on Lawrence Taylor, a lot of his stories and stories about him are "absurd" but him switching his sample with another players so he wouldn't fail the drug test, then failing anyways because the other players sample produced a failed test, that was something.
#8 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 11 October 2013 - 11:04 PM
George Ratterman was Otto Graham's backup quarterback from 1952 through 1955 after which Graham retired. Ratterman had a reputation as a practical joker, and Cleveland coach and GM Paul Brown had a sample in 1949.
After winning the final AAFC championship in 1949, a game was arranged between the Browns and an All-Star team composed of players from other AAFC teams. On one of the days before the game, Ratternman called the Browns and said that their practice had been cancelled due to the rain. The guy who answered the phone started to tell the players, but assistant coach Blanton Collier happened to be nearby, and hearing about the cancellation, smelled a rat(terman). Collier called up Paul Brown and found out that it was a hoax.
Later at Cleveland, the Browns found out more of this. Ratterman once doctored scouting reports on an upcoming opponent with things like: "This man will fall down if tackled", and "This man (a defensive back) can be beaten on passing if he falls down and the receiver catches the ball."
Ratterman was always pulling pranks, but one time Brown got him back a little. In 1952, Otto Graham was having kind of an off year (for him), and in some of his more erratic moments, the crowd would chant, "We want Ratterman." Once when this happened, coach Brown called him over and said, "Your friends are calling for you." Ratterman thought, "Am I going into the game and run the offense?" Brown then said, "Why don't you go up into the stands and join them."
#9 Ken Crippen
Administrator
Posted 12 October 2013 - 07:36 AM
Jagade, on 11 Oct 2013 - 11:04 PM, said:
George Ratterman was Otto Graham's backup quarterback from 1952 through 1955 after which Graham retired. Ratterman had a reputation as a practical joker, and Cleveland coach and GM Paul Brown had a sample in 1949.
After winning the final AAFC championship in 1949, a game was arranged between the Browns and an All-Star team composed of players from other AAFC teams. On one of the days before the game, Ratternman called the Browns and said that their practice had been cancelled due to the rain. The guy who answered the phone started to tell the players, but assistant coach Blanton Collier happened to be nearby, and hearing about the cancellation, smelled a rat(terman). Collier called up Paul Brown and found out that it was a hoax.
Later at Cleveland, the Browns found out more of this. Ratterman once doctored scouting reports on an upcoming opponent with things like: "This man will fall down if tackled", and "This man (a defensive back) can be beaten on passing if he falls down and the receiver catches the ball."
Ratterman was always pulling pranks, but one time Brown got him back a little. In 1952, Otto Graham was having kind of an off year (for him), and in some of his more erratic moments, the crowd would chant, "We want Ratterman." Once when this happened, coach Brown called him over and said, "Your friends are calling for you." Ratterman thought, "Am I going into the game and run the offense?" Brown then said, "Why don't you go up into the stands and join them."
I highly recommend Ratterman's book "Confessions of a Gypsy Quarterback." Otto Graham wrote the introduction. One paragraph read, "The purpose of this foreward is to introduce you to a character named George Ratterman. George is a gentleman who sat on the bench my last four years and counted his money while I was risking life and limb. It only seems fitting that I should start off this book while George sits back and collects all of the royalties."
#10 Teo
PFRA Member
Posted 12 October 2013 - 10:59 AM
The stories about former Rams and Chargers coach Tommy Prothro are hilarious. One training camp with the Rams, Phrothro gathered the team and said to them: "Gentlemen, we have worked very hard this past weeks, so why we ho all put yo the beach". The players immediatily ran to their cars and Fred Dryer was knocked down and injured his thigh. Then, when he got to his car, the car wouldn't start and all the players had gone to the beach by then, and Dryer tried to fix it, then Phrothro came and said (very serious): "Dryah, you're missing the bettah part of the day".
#11 Todd Pence
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Posted 12 October 2013 - 01:46 PM
Bob Gladieux being axed in the final cut by the 1970 Patriots. When he attended their opener against the Dolphins, he was summoned by PA to the locker room and told to suit up. He then proceeded to make the tackle on the opening kickoff.
#12 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 12 October 2013 - 10:53 PM
Ken Crippen, on 12 Oct 2013 - 07:36 AM, said:
I highly recommend Ratterman's book "Confessions of a Gypsy Quarterback." Otto Graham wrote the introduction. One paragraph read, "The purpose of this foreward is to introduce you to a character named George Ratterman. George is a gentleman who sat on the bench my last four years and counted his money while I was risking life and limb. It only seems fitting that I should start off this book while George sits back and collects all of the royalties."
Yes, that is a good one. Art Donovan and George Ratterman both played for the 1951 New York Yanks. The team didn't do very well, but they did have some fun playing various pranks on each other, but Donovan said about Ratterman that no one ever messed with him. He was too crazy.
#13 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 12 October 2013 - 10:58 PM
Teo, on 12 Oct 2013 - 10:59 AM, said:
The stories about former Rams and Chargers coach Tommy Prothro are hilarious. One training camp with the Rams, Phrothro gathered the team and said to them: "Gentlemen, we have worked very hard this past weeks, so why we ho all put yo the beach". The players immediatily ran to their cars and Fred Dryer was knocked down and injured his thigh. Then, when he got to his car, the car eouldn't start and all the players had gone to the beach by then, and Dryer tried to fix it, then Phrothro came and said (very serious): "Dryah, you're missing the bettah part if the day".
Here is one I heard about Prothro. Fred Dryer said that a kicker was practicing kicking field goals when Prothro rode out on the practice field in a golf cart. Prothro ran over a player's foot, causing a broken bone and the player was lost for the season.
#14 Gabe
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Posted 13 October 2013 - 11:13 AM
Another George Ratterman story relates to the time he replied to one of Paul Brown's messenger guards during a game, "I don't like that play, tell Brown to send in another one." Supposedly the guard started to run back to the sidelines before Ratterman called him back to the huddle.
One of my favorite stories is the dialogue between Alex Karras and Joe Schmidt when Karras had an off-season ob as a door to door bible salesman one year, and showed up at Schmidt's house trying to sell him a bible stating that his had a different ending than all the others Schmidt had previously bought or read. It is in one of George Plimpton's books and is hilarious dialogue.
#15 Todd Pence
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Posted 13 October 2013 - 12:17 PM
Arthur Cox, a Falcons tight end from the 1980's, had to have his knee surgery rescheduled. The doctor had instructed Cox not to eat anything after six P.M. on the night before his surgery the next morning. When Cox reported for surgery the next morning, the doctor asked him if he had eaten anything after six the previous night, "No," replied Cox, "But I had a big breakfast this morning."
#16 Jeffrey Miller
PFRA Member
Posted 13 October 2013 - 12:47 PM
Mike Mercer told me the story of Harvey Johnson's first team meeting after taking over as head coach of the Buffalo Bills in 1968. His rousing introductory speech went something like this: "I keep hearing all of this "if" shit ... we would have won "if" we had done this, we would have won "if" we had done that ... well, I'm sick of this "if" shit. Hell, if the Pilgrims had shot a cat instead of a turkey, we'd all be eating pussy for Thanksgiving ..."
#17 ronfitch
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Posted 13 October 2013 - 10:20 PM
In Showtime's "Full Color Football," New York Titan Alex Kroll tells the story of the practice during the '62 season when the players realized that the coaches had disappeared - and quickly figured out that they (the coaches) had quietly snuck away to get a head start on the players to cash their paychecks, knowing that the team couldn't make payroll. Funny ... in retrospect.
#18 Nwebster
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Posted 14 October 2013 - 06:00 PM
ronfitch, on 13 Oct 2013 - 10:20 PM, said:
In Showtime's "Full Color Football," New York Titan Alex Kroll tells the story of the practice during the '62 season when the players realized that the coaches had disappeared - and quickly figured out that they (the coaches) had quietly snuck away to get a head start on the players to cash their paychecks, knowing that the team couldn't make payroll. Funny ... in retrospect.
Rick Neuheisel quoted something similar as happenings Ng with the San Antonio Gunslingers. Though I suppose that's probably not all that unusual in a "minor" league.
#19 Rupert Patrick
PFRA Member
Posted 14 October 2013 - 09:03 PM
Todd Pence, on 13 Oct 2013 - 12:17 PM, said:
Arthur Cox, a Falcons tight end from the 1980's, had to have his knee surgery rescheduled. The doctor had instructed Cox not to eat anything after six P.M. on the night before his surgery the next morning. When Cox reported for surgery the next morning, the doctor asked him if he had eaten anything after six the previous night, "No," replied Cox, "But I had a big breakfast this morning."
It reminded me of the Elvis Presley story about the time he had to go to the hospital first thing in the morning for a surgery, and the doctors told him he could not eat in the morning after he woke up, so in the middle of the night, he had one of his entourage wake him up and Elvis ate an entire cherry pie and went back to bed. No wonder he died at the age of 42.
#20 JuggernautJ
PFRA Member
Posted 14 October 2013 - 11:38 PM
This story regards one of the more famous blocks in NFL history.
The 73-0 drubbing that the Chicago Bears laid on the Washington Redskins in the 1940 Championship game began when (according to George Halas*)
"on the second play ... the ball went to fullback Bill Osmanski... (who) swung wide and ran 68 yards to a touchdown.
"I've seen plenty of hard blocks in my time but never one like the one which made this touchdown possible. George Wilson... threw it and it flattened both Ed Justice and Jimmy Johnson."
According to Howard Roberts**:
Halas later said "That was the greatest, most viscous block I ever saw." but
"Osmanksi shared a taxi with George and Mrs Wilson... after the game and in the course of the ride Mrs Wilson congratulated Bill on his amazing run." Adding "and that was quite a block... bye the way -- who threw it?
"George Wilson's reaction to that remark has never been recorded."
*The Forward Pass Revolution from The Saturday Evening Post of Dec 7, 1957 quoted in Allison Danzig's
Oh, How They Played The Game
**The Story of Pro Football by Howard Roberts p 28
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oldecapecod 11
your favorite absurd football stories
Started by JWL, Oct 11 2013 12:23 AM
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56 replies to this topic
#21 BD Sullivan
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Posted 15 October 2013 - 12:39 AM
Ray Malavasi was being interviewed by a morning radio person--and fell asleep during the interview, complete with snoring.
Malavasi also had what might the most absurd comment in football history. After he found out his comments specifically ripping some Rams players were recorded, his response was "I don't care if it's on tape, I didn't say it."
#22 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 15 October 2013 - 12:56 AM
I am surprised that none of Joe Don Looney's exploits are not on this thread, yet.
Joe Don, a running back, was the first round draft choice of the New York Giants in 1964. He seemed to have everything. He was fast, built like a truck, and could play football. You might say that he had an attitude.
Looney, after some problems with the Giants' coaching staff, was traded to Baltimore, and after a short stay there, was traded to Detroit. I will focus on a couple of his milder incidents in Detroit.
He missed a practice with the Lions, so they sent in Joe Schmidt to have a talk with Joe Don in his dorm room. Schmidt told Looney that in all his years with Detroit, he never missed a practice. Joe Don replied, "Gee Joe, you need a day off."
In a game, coach Gilmer decided to send a play in and called Looney over. Harry Gilmer told Joe Don that he wanted him to take a play in to the quarterback. Looney replied, "If you want a messenger boy, call Western Union." I believe that Joe Don Looney was traded to Washington shortly after.
I guess that there are many other stories about Looney (I believe that there is a book), but those at Detroit were just a couple that I read about.
#23 John Grasso
Board of Directors
Posted 15 October 2013 - 08:30 AM
Here's a Joe Don Looney line from a 1969 Sports Illustrated article
"One night when he was 10 minutes late for bed check, he deemed the $50 fine unfair because he had gone to bed an hour early the night before. "They still owe me 50 minutes," he explained."
http://sportsillustr...ine/MAG1082669/
#24 TouchdownTimmy
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Posted 15 October 2013 - 03:32 PM
Jagade, on 15 Oct 2013 - 12:56 AM, said:
I am surprised that non of Joe Don Looney's exploits are not on this thread, yet.
Joe Don, a running back, was the first round draft choice of the New York Giants in 1964. He seemed to have everything. He was fast, built like a truck, and could play football. You might say that he had an attitude.
Looney, after some problems with the Giants' coaching staff, was traded to Baltimore, and after a short stay there, was traded to Detroit. I will focus on a couple of his milder incidents in Detroit.
He missed a practice with the Lions, so they sent in Joe Schmidt to have a talk with Joe Don in his dorm room. Schmidt told Looney that in all his years with Detroit, he never missed a practice. Joe Don replied, "Gee Joe, you need a day off."
In a game, coach Gilmer decided to send a play in and called Looney over. Harry Gilmer told Joe Don that he wanted him to take a play in to the quarterback. Looney replied, "If you want a messenger boy, call Western Union." I believe that Joe Don Looney was traded to Washington shortly after.
I guess that there are many other stories about Looney (I believe that there is a book), but those at Detroit were just a couple that I read about.
Looney was a first round pick who supposedly had everything. Why is he never considered a bust?
#25 TouchdownTimmy
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Posted 15 October 2013 - 03:38 PM
Charles Philyaw of the Oakland Raiders. In his book "They Call Me Assassin", Jack Tatum tells the story of how Philyaw wanted to know why he couldn't have his whole name on the back of his jersey. When it was explained to him that no one had their full name on their jersey, Philyaw said "Yes they do. See? VAN Eeghen."
#26 Jagade
PFRA Member
Posted 15 October 2013 - 08:38 PM
TouchdownTimmy, on 15 Oct 2013 - 3:32 PM, said:
Looney was a first round pick who supposedly had everything. Why is he never considered a bust?
I would guess that the Giants considered Looney to be a bust. I am sure that they wished that they had used their first round pick on someone else.
Of course, the Giants were one of the last teams to pick in the NFL draft that year, being that they played in the 1963 NFL championship game (the Giants picked 12th). Even worse would be to pick first or second and have the player not turn out very good. The Dallas Cowboys picked 4th that same year and picked a tackle named Scott Appleton in the first round. Appleton signed with the Houston Oilers instead of Dallas.
#27 rhickok1109
PFRA Member
Posted 16 October 2013 - 09:14 AM
Jagade, on 15 Oct 2013 - 8:38 PM, said:
I would guess that the Giants considered Looney to be a bust. I am sure that they wished that they had used their first round pick on someone else.
Of course, the Giants were one of the last teams to pick in the NFL draft that year, being that they played in the 1963 NFL championship game (the Giants picked 12th). Even worse would be to pick first or second and have the player not turn out very good. The Dallas Cowboys picked 4th that same year and picked a tackle named Scott Appleton in the first round. Appleton signed with the Houston Oilers instead of Dallas.
Appleton couldn't be called a bust, but he was a rather ordinary player.
#28 3243
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Posted 17 October 2013 - 03:55 AM
NWebster, on 11 Oct 2013 - 07:43 AM, said:
when you hear these stories from the 50's you thank God Roger Goodell wasn't commissioner back then, these guys would've been suspended for weeks and weeks.
And that's just for their off-field antics. For the way they played Goodell would have had each of the NFL's players transported to a CIA secret prison in some remote country.
#29 3243
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Posted 17 October 2013 - 04:21 AM
There was Bill Peterson, who signed a "lifetime" contract in 1972 to coach the Houston Oilers, and was fired in mid-1973. (Hey, it was a LIFETIME deal! So what if he was 1-18? )
Apparently, Peterson also fought a losing battle with the English language as well, once telling his Oilers before a game to make sure they lined up correctly for the National Anthem--"with the sideline under your right arms and each of you standing on your helmets." Another time, he began a pre-game prayer with "Now I lay me down to sleep..."
When asked by a reporter about the players he had drafted in 1973 and how they would improve the team, Peterson did say kind words about "Matsooee, Amerson, and Blowchek," who were John Matuszak, George Amundson, and Joe Blahak, respectively. His propensity for getting names wrong also extended to veteran players like Elvin Bethea (whom he called Bethford), Mike Fanucci (Fasoochi), Ron Billingsley (Billingee), and Council Rudolph (Randolph Council).
Perhaps he would have had more success in the NFL (as he had as head coach at Florida State and Rice before taking the Oiler job) if he could only have taught his players at least this one thing: "You guys have to run more than full speed out there."
#30 rhickok1109
PFRA Member
Posted 17 October 2013 - 09:31 AM
3243, on 17 Oct 2013 - 04:21 AM, said:
There was Bill Peterson, who signed a "lifetime" contract in 1972 to coach the Houston Oilers, and was fired in mid-1973. (Hey, it was a LIFETIME deal! So what if he was 1-18? )
Apparently, Peterson also fought a losing battle with the English language as well, once telling his Oilers before a game to make sure they lined up correctly for the National Anthem--"with the sideline under your right arms and each of you standing on your helmets." Another time, he began a pre-game prayer with "Now I lay me down to sleep..."
When asked by a reporter about the players he had drafted in 1973 and how they would improve the team, Peterson did say kind words about "Matsooee, Amerson, and Blowchek," who were John Matuszak, George Amundson, and Joe Blahak, respectively. His propensity for getting names wrong also extended to veteran players like Elvin Bethea (whom he called Bethford), Mike Fanucci (Fasoochi), Ron Billingsley (Billingee), and Council Rudolph (Randolph Council).
Perhaps he would have had more success in the NFL (as he had as head coach at Florida State and Rice before taking the Oiler job) if he could only have taught his players at least this one thing: "You guys have to run more than full speed out there."
Peterson who once told his players to "line up alphabetically by height." He did come up with some gems
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